My kids....My heart

My kids....My heart

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Love Can Not Heal A Broken Mind

I’ve spoken and written much about the power of love. I have always had a quiet knowing that love is the foundation for everything we do. Love holds the power to heal a broken heart. Love is the vessel in which one soul reaches another.

Love is

~Magnificent ~ Miraculous ~ Brilliant ~ Glorious

The belief that love conquers all sustained my belief that love could also heal a broken psyche. The gut wrenching truth is love can not heal a tortured mind. What I describe as a tortured mind doctors describe as clinical depression. I now know this; love alone can not heal depression. This realization has brought me to my knees. Literally. This truth is the hardest truth I have ever had to bear.

Lately, there have been days I feel like I have to remind myself to breathe. Have you ever breathed so deep, you felt as though you might swallow your own lungs? For a moment, you are unable to breathe at all. That’s how it feels when you watch your partner suffocating in their own mental anguish. It’s as though they’ve become paralyzed from the mental torment they have no words to describe. And you become paralyzed from the fear of their pain. A broken mind suffers in solitude because the voice of inner torment is so loud that the tormented are no longer able to hear a gentle voice whispering softly that they are loved. No words filter through the pain and no amount of physical touch heals the self inflicted wounds caused by mental anguish.

It’s difficult for me to describe accurately the depth of aloneness I have felt while watching the man I love become isolated by his own tortured thoughts. The brutal reality is that my love can not save him in those dark moments when he no longer loves himself.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Gosh!!!! Praying for you and Wynn. Love you guys terrribly!!!! Depression is just awful. I've watched my mom battle it for many, many years. Right now she is doing really well. And I embrace every good moment and phone call I recieve. I've been wanting to blog about it these past couple months with her in and out of the hospital, but just don't know how to write it very well. But, you like always, just did!! Love you much!!!

Misty Holt said...

Aunt Sher, I love you. I know that you have been going to through a lot. If you need anything, please call me. I feel a little distant lately, but I have been thinking of you a lot.

Godspeed.